Vlog 4: Baby's Almost Crawling!

Sep 21, 2015


My baby is almost crawling! Here's a new little family vlog. Most footage is from last month! The end is my favorite. Noah is equally obsessed with his mama and papa! When he hears Emanuel comes home he stops what ever he is doing and focuses on the staircase until he sees him - then goes nuts! It's the cutest thing! It makes me want to cry of joy every time. I am so grateful for my family!
                          


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Quiet Time

Sep 16, 2015

Col 3.14: And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.
For my birthday this year, I splurged on a Bible I've been wanting for about 2 years. If you haven't read the post on my goals this year, you can catch up right here. So without getting too deep, I haven't had quiet time in a LONG time. And by long I mean a year and some. Prior to becoming a mother, I had this idea of how I would be as one, and behave towards my future husband. A few weeks into motherhood, and lacking more and more in my relationship with God, I broke down before my Bible Study group. I remember looking up when I was done talking and some there were also in tears. I was just tremendously overwhelmed with these new roles in my life and something about them both just weren't clicking in line with my faith. I felt like my life was in scrambles. Emanuel would go work the entire day (he doesn't have a regular 9-5), and I would stay home, alone with this new & beautiful baby boy, except not knowing a thing about motherhood nor what to expect. As much joy as my tiny Noah brought me, I felt everything was out of place. One thing after another isolated me more and more and drew me further from God and His Word. I slacked in church attendance, probably disappointed my pastors (who have been there for me through it all), disappointed myself, but above all, God.

I look back at the times I would document my time with God through instagram, and boy was it fun. I use to think time with Him was to be super private, and while it could be, everything changed when I discovered a community of women setting an awesome example of study habits and sharing their faith. I loved to see photos of others during their devotion and sharing what they felt they were learning. It was so encouraging! I would follow instagram threads like #lampandlight and #shereadstruth, and every time I was more motivated to study and my faith grew sharper.

I'm not going to get too into what I felt drew me away, but to say the least I stopped during pregnancy after getting extremely offended and disrespected by some youth pastors comment from the stage. This "leader" although they probably had "best intentions" at heart, completely took the Word out of context, mislead others, and in my opinion simply said something that should have never been said. I stopped attending church for months and didn't even care. I could also have cared less about whether or not I ever came in contact with this person again. I can say now that I was a little rough, and unforgiving, which is so unlike Christ.

Anyway, after having my son, the guilt began. I began to feel guilty for not seeking God prior to making decisions, not praying (this was the biggest one), lacking faith, and the list goes on. In the beginning of my motherhood journey I felt down, but it wasn't due to being a new mom, as postpartum might suggest, it was due to this: my overturned relationship with God. At the moment, I didn't know this. This is a conclusion I have came to after reading into all the journals, feelings and thoughts from that time. Now, almost 8 months into the journey, I can pin-point what was "wrong".
To both, Emanuel and Noah, I felt like a failure. Although Emanuel was there to remind me day and night that I was doing a great job, when I looked in the mirror all I saw was confusion, absence of faith, a short temper, disorder, isolation.

Thankfully, I've come a long way since then. I'm excited to embark in a new journey, reading the Word. I'm pretty sure everything I study will speak to me differently since I'm in the most interesting season I've been in my life! I thought the verse I came across today was very fitting. Out of all the positive things I want to become, I need to learn to love all as well as forgive. I know I will be a better person through it.
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Year 23: Goals

Sep 13, 2015

If you know me personally, follow me on Instagram, or have me on Facebook, you might have known I turned 23 years old on Friday, September 11. It was definitely a special one considering it was my first time becoming a year older as a new mom! As always, I kept my birthday festivities simple with a nice dinner and quality time with loved and close ones. Sadly, the entire week before and on my birthday, my son, fiancee and myself were quite sick. I took Noah for the first time to the doctor on Monday the 7th because he had a rising fever of 101.1, and shortly after that we became sick. Gratefully, we are all getting better! In that sense, its been a rough week. A lot of sleepless nights and some concerns as new parents.

Despite those feelings, I took some time to evaluate my life and who I am. I decided I want to go for some changes and set new goals for this year. I came up with 5 realistic terminal points which I believe are achievable.

  1. STUDY SCRIPTURE
I have a personal post addressing this topic. It will be live on Wednesday! But briefly, a gift to myself this year was a journaling Bible I've been wanting for about 2 years now. Its the most beautiful Bible I have ever owned and I can't wait to tear it down with annotations, notes, reminders. To me that is what it should be all about. Personalizing it and truly wearing it out in use. For months, my scripture study has been collecting dust (which I will get into in the next post), but I am more excited than ever to dig in again and reconnect with that being that is greater than I or my plans could ever be.

     2.  FITNESS JOURNEY

As of Monday, Sept. 14, 2015, I will begin to document my fitness journey. I have a serious meal plan and workout routine to stick to four times per week in hopes of getting back into shape and my pre-pregnancy weight. I will document this privately, because it is something personal to me, but I will share more about it via Instagram when I notice results.

    3. BLOG SCHEDULE

I think this is a goal I renew every year, whether its my birthday or New Year's. As for my blog and channel, it is important to me that I succeed in what I do. I am taking my organization and productivity to the next level and hope to meet all the standards I have set for myself in the blogging business.

     4. INTENTIONAL MOTHER & WIFE

This goal is pretty self explanatory, and it is also one I see myself renewing over and over. Because it is an area I can always improve and grow in, I keep reminding myself. It is still surreal that I have my own home and family. It is important to me that I hold that up to the best of my ability and exceed expectations.

     5. USE TIME WISELY (day designer)

You might know of my latest planner/daily agenda The Day Designer. (read my post on it here) It is truly my intention to make the most out of my day in every aspect. I want to utilize my Day Designer and get the maximum effect out of it. So far, I have been loving how it has helped me keep up with my daily musings! -Review coming soon!

Ahh, there they are! I want to have positive mind-set, but if I could be honest, #2 will be the most challenging. Wish me the best! I am excited for another year living this awesome life God has granted me!

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Starting a Blog | Notes of Grace 002

Sep 8, 2015

Have you ever thought about starting a blog? Here are the top 5 reasons people hold back and I'm giving you 5 reasons on why I think you should look pass them and go for it! Going forward, I have had a few people write me lately in regards to starting one and tips on how to. It has prompt me to develop a "Blogging" series. I will announce it via Instagram when the first video in terms of that is up. This particular video isn't a blogging guide- simply a push to start if its something you've considered for a while. I've learned so much throughout my blogging journey!
I feel like in some way or another, it has made me a better person, as I have learned much about myself. I believe one of the greatest things we can do is step over our fears and rise up to whatever intimidates us. Do what you want and bring good into the world! I hope that after watching this video you are encouraged to pursue a new journey!
                        
                             
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